Wednesday, March 16th

Today was a day off from the program, but they arranged an option trip to Masada, Qumran and a beach on the Dead Sea for those who were interested (everyone ended up going except for most of the staff).
Masada, our first stop, was about an hour and a half away so we left earlier than usual. I realized early on that I forgot my camera and my shorts in my room. The camera wasn't too big a deal since the staff member who went with us is taking a lot of pictures and posting them online. The shorts, however, meant no floating for me. We arrived at Masada, got our tickets and headed up in the cable car (we started about one thousand feet below sea level and ended up about one hundred feet below sea level, I think). Masada is a series of ruins, of a fortress and palace, from the time of Herod the Great on an isolated plateau (although built prior to Herod the Great and modified and used afterwards by the Zealots fleeing from the Romans). The view from Masada of the Dead Sea and the surrounding mountains on both sides was like nothing I've ever seen, just wait until I get pictures from Rod. Aside from the view, seeing and learning about the engineering feats they accomplished thousands of years was great. The water system they developed was amazing. Through cisterns, some aqueducts and tunnels built into the mountain side they were able to harness enough water from the flash floods to last nearly a year.
After Masada we headed to Qumran and saw the ruins of the Essenes. These were less impressive than those at Masada, but it was cool to see where the Dead Sea Scrolls came from. We ate lunch here and then headed off to the beach. As I said, I forgot my shorts and I didn't think it worth it to buy a bathing suit so I ended up sitting with another spectacular view of the Dead Sea and the Kingdom of Jordan beyond and I read (there were actually only a few people who went in, so most of us ended up doing this or something similar). After the beach we headed back to the college and now I'm waiting for Evening Prayer and Dinner.

Tuesday, March 15th "The Birth of the Messiah"

Today was a day of mixed emotions for me. We headed out in the morning to Bethlehem. Outside the city we stopped at the Shepherd's Fields and spent about an hour and a half or so there. It was very beautiful there (and this is in its reduced size, it used to be all fields but now it's cut off by a few settlements and towns popping up around it, I would love to have seen it when it was just fields). It was also surprisingly quiet. For a good chunk of the time we were there it was only our group, a few other groups came in but they quickly headed out. After we left here we stopped at an olive wood coop. There was a lot of really beautiful stuff here, but most of it was really expensive and I'd have no use for it, so I only picked up a few small things (a Jerusalem cross for my wall, and a few small carved pieces).
Lunch was really neat. We went to a place called something like the Shepherds Tent Restaurant. It was a big tent with booths and benches around tables. The booths and benches were covered in blankets and pillows, it had a desert feel to it. For lunch we had pita and the accompanying dishes (humus, baba ganoush, and all the rest), it was delicious, and the atmosphere was fun.
After lunch we headed into the city to visit the Basilica of the Nativity. First I was a little perturbed by the fact that it was such a large impoverished city, no O Little Town of Bethlehem, but O City with an unemployment rate in the 40's of Bethlehem... In the Basilica I experienced a mix of awe and frustration/cynicism. It is beautiful, the area around the Cave of the Nativity was filled, and I mean filled, with scents and icons, and hanging lamps (although some of these had Christmas tree ornaments on the bottom which I found comical). What bothered me about the Basilica was the sense of tourist site it gave me. I had trouble really being present to this Holy Site of my tradition, because of this sense of lining up and taking pictures, the sense of being a tourist pilgrimage. This continued to bother me throughout the day, it's something consistent throughout this area, but it really struck me here (maybe because it's the first place we had to wait in line to see something and then were sort of ushered through it to make way for the group behind us). It must have really been something to behold without this spirit of tourism.
When we came back we had a little time before Evening Prayer. Evening prayer was led by a friend of mine from St. Paul's K Street who is over here working with the State Department. After the service we went out to dinner. It was great catching up with him and hearing about his experiences working here. I also hadn't been into West Jerusalem yet so it was good to get over and see it. Very different from East Jerusalem where the Cathedral is, much more westernized.

Monday, March 14th "Rivers in the Desert"

Up until today the weather had been wet, cold or a combination of the two. Today was a beautiful warm day, which was great because we went out to the Judean Wilderness in the morning. The spot we went to was about a twenty minute drive away. We drove out into the desert and started on these windy roads and then pulled off onto a little parking lot on the side of one of these roads. Walking down a rocky path which led to an old road brought us to an old British pumping station. From here we followed a little stream into the wilderness. After a little while we stopped and Andrew, the course director, gave a little reflection on the wilderness and then we had a little over an hour to wander around. I explored for about half the time then found a spot to sit and read some psalms. The wilderness was incredibly beautiful, the stark contrast of the lush wildlife surrounding the water only feet away from the desert rock (I'll post pictures when I get home). I don't know exactly what I was expecting or imagining when I read the biblical accounts of this wilderness, but it certainly wasn't this and I was definitely surprised in a breathtaking way.
Not much happened the rest of the day. A lot of reading, a little sermon prep. I also had my second cup of real coffee since getting here, it was wonderful. Although, I had been getting used to the instant coffee they have available for us at the college and now I'll probably have to readjust to it again. That is one thing I won't miss about this place, the terrible terrible coffee. At least there's good stuff nearby.
We're going to start traveling a little more now. Tomorrow we head to Bethlehem, the day after to Qumran, Masada and the Dead Sea, a couple days after that we're off to Galilee for a couple of days. Things are getting more and more exciting and are starting to pick up.

Sunday, March 13th "O Worship the Lord"

Today was mostly a free day. I meant to go to the Arabic service at St. George's Cathedral but didn't make it. It worked out though that by going to the later English service I was able to meet a priest who was assisting at that service who used to be connected with St. Mary's in Portsmouth and lived in North Kingstown. My allergies were pretty nasty all day so I spent the rest of the day laying low and reading.
After dinner we had an Israel come in to speak with us about his view on the peace process. He is a member of the Israeli Army and also the Director of Kids4Peace (www.kids4peacejerusalem.org). He had a very interesting story, he was raised a hasidic Jew in an ultra orthodox city, where he had never spoken to women outside of immediate family or anyone that was not also ultra orthodox. When he was eighteen he left the community to join the army and then eventually started K4P. He struggles with his army service but says that ultimately he wants to be there because he is able to do his service as the Director of K4P, he is able to bring dignity and his desire for peace to the work he does for the service (he serves in a unit that collects body parts after explosions).
I really enjoyed hearing from him, both his story and about the progress K4P is making. I think, however, it would have been interesting to hear a more pro-zionist voice. I don't know how well that would have worked there though, it may not be received too well at all. Still, it was nice to have a fairly moderate view.
I was very impressed with the K4P program. The way they bring the kids together and the fellowship and learning that happens was very inspiring. It has me wondering about possibility of interfaith youth events back home. Not that we have problems like here, but the mutual learning that could happen would be great.

Saturday, March 12th "Explorations"

Today we were broken into small groups and sent to explore the Old City. Each group was given a Quarter to go to and interact with the locals and learn more about the people there than to be actual tourists. My group was sent to the Muslim Quarter. A few minutes after entering the Quarter through Herod's Gate we stopped to look at a map and decide where to go. While we were standing a man came up and asked if we needed help. We explained what we were doing and he gave us directions to good places to see, then before leaving he invited us to come back to his home for tea and coffee. He spoke with us for a while regarding his experience of living in Jerusalem. His hospitality was very touching and inspiring. After this we walked around the Muslim Quarter, and in and out of the other Quarters. Eventually we found ourselves at Christ Church and were given a tour of the cistern ruins underneath one of their buildings that were from the gardens of Herod's Palace. We also made our way to XXX Lutheran Church and went up the bell tower where we had a fantastic view of the entire city.
We regrouped in the late afternoon back at the college to share our experiences. It was great to hear about what the other groups did and who they met. They each had their own interesting experiences in their Quarters.
I'm still blown away by the hospitality that was shown to my group today. I can't imagine that happening in a city back home. This man was a shop keeper in the Muslim Quarter and had no connection to us at all. I was a little nervous at first but I'm very glad to have been with my group and to be stretched past my comfort zone so I could experience that hospitality. It was definitely something I will remember for a while.

Friday, March 11th "Jerusalem the Golden" (and a little of the 9th and 10th too)

Today was the first full day of the program. I arrived yesterday after a long and boring flight, arriving at St. George's shortly after noon. UPon arriving I met Caroline, a fellow pilgrim in the course who is the Rector of St. Luke's in the Field and actually applied to be Rector of St. John's in Barrington ten years ago. Once I got settled in Caroline and I went to lunch down Salahadeen Street and then I crashed for the afternoon. At six we had an opening Eucharist followed by an opening reception in dinner. After dinner Kevin, the course chaplain who is an ordained Brother at the Society of St. John the Evangelist in Cambridge, and I took a walk to the temple mount. It was really interesting walking through the old city at night. They have a lot of feral cats so they leave raw goat all over the place at night (one pile we saw had a goats face). There were also Israeli soldiers stationed all over the place. Kevin has been to Jerusalem eight times so he pointed a lout out and was a great guide. We came back and I crashed for the night around nine.
Today I woke up at six thirty for the seven o'clock Eucharist. I've found their worship to be very similar but with some clear differences from the Book of Common Prayer (which they have at every pew, but we were assured this was because they were free and not for any other reason...). After breakfast we had introductions to the staff and each other and then a little free time before our first lecture. Today's topic was 'Jerusalem the Golden'. We had a very condensed lecture on the history of Jerusalem focusing on the many names it has been called over the past five thousand years. To start this off Andrew, the course director, read Psalm 122. I'm used to the BCP version which reads: "Jerusalem is built as a city* that is at unity with itself" the version Andrew read said something along the lines of Jerusalem is a city bound together with itself. Hearing this made me think that Andrew's translation was a little more accurate, considering the history and present being bound together makes more sense than being at unity.
After this we visited a convent of French nuns outside of the city where we ate lunch and then went up onto their roof for a view of the city. Words can't do justice to this city. We had an amazing view of city and the Mount of Olives. We left the convent and drove up the Mount of Olives to get a view of the desert opposite the city. It's very striking how close everything is. Today we received wide views of the city and the desert, tomorrow and Monday respectively we'll get to explore each of these more intimately. We spent the afternoon back at the college. There was Evening Prayer at six, which again was very similar with a few differences, and then we had dinner.
Over the past two days there are two things that struck me. First, last night, the smells of this city. Every block had a new smell and there was hardly a bad smell. I was very surprised by this because it is not my experience of cities at all. Today I was struck by the the sheer beauty of the city and the surrounding landscape. Looking over the city from the convent roof was simply breathtaking. I can't imaging what it must have been like traveling from the east, topping the Mount of Olives and seeing the golden city before you. I am very excited to explore and learn more about this Holy place.

Eighth and Final Sermon at St. Paul's K Street

Sixth Sunday After Easter, Year C
John 14:23-29

I want to take a second here to acknowledge all the moms with us, Happy Mother’s Day. Looking at the readings for today, before even knowing that today was going to be Mother’s Day, I had started thinking about the Gospel reading in relation to what could be described as behaving ourselves, pretty appropriate I’d say, talking about behaving ourselves or good behavior on Mother’s Day.
When I started thinking about the Gospel reading I was reminded of some of my classes as a philosophy student at the University of Rhode Island, specifically I was reminded of the work of Michel Foucault. Michel Foucault was a French philosopher who died in the 1980’s. He is known for his work having to do with power relations. In his work he talks about how different social institutions are at their core about exerting power over people, all the institutions that make up our society, according to Foucault, are concerned with control and dominance. In his book Discipline & Punish he discusses how knowledge equals power. As an example of this he uses the idea of the panopticon, a prison structure that allows the prisoners to be seen at all times but does not allow the prisoners the ability to know whether or not they are being observed at any given moment. The idea is that the prisoners live in a constant state of uneasiness unsure if they are being watched, and because of this they behave. The idea that someone might see what they are doing, the idea that someone might know what they are doing should influence their behavior, knowledge of their behavior is thus translated into power over them, translated into control and domination. According to Foucault’s thought people act the way we do because of power relations, because we have been manipulated to act in a certain way, because, whether we are aware of it or not, we are controlled to act as we do.
As Christians we have to disagree with this idea that what we do is a product of someone or something else controlling or forcing our actions. As Christians our actions should not be forced or be the product of manipulation, but they should be our own. I am not claiming that we act or make decisions without any influences over us, that would simply be untrue. There will of course always be countless factors influencing our decisions and actions, what I am saying is that ultimately we make the decisions ourselves. Except in extreme circumstances, we are not forced or coerced into acting or deciding.
In today’s Gospel reading Jesus tells us that “those who love [him] will keep [his] word”. Jesus gives us a basis for our action in stark contrast to that given by Foucault. When we act it is love that guides us, not power that dominates and controls us. Certainly, Christianity has not always gotten this right. Indeed, there are many instances where we have gotten this wrong, where we have forced our ideals and beliefs upon others. And while these have been done with good intentions, with the salvation of the other in mind, it is ultimately not how we are to act. Jesus tells us that we do not follow him because we are forced to. No, we follow Jesus because we love him. It is our love for Jesus that makes us want to follow the way he has set before us. It is this love for Jesus that pushes us to become his disciples. Christianity is about love not about domination and control.
So we act how we do, we follow Christ, not because the Church or scripture or anything or anyone else tells us that we must do so, but rather out of our love for Christ. In thinking about this I am reminded, appropriately enough for today, of my Mom. Growing up there were plenty of times when my Mom sought to influence my behavior. Some of these times she would act more in line with Foucault’s thought, telling me that I had to do something or another, usually with consequences if I failed to do so or did otherwise. This happened quite a lot actually, and sometimes I would do as she wished and sometimes I wouldn’t. There was another way, however, that my Mom influenced my behavior, and still does. Growing up, my Mom modeled certain ways of behavior, or would teach me appropriate ways of acting in different situations. She wouldn’t try force me to act in these ways, but she told me or showed me that they were right and good ways to act. My love and respect for my Mom, made me realize the rightness of what she showed or taught me, and this love and respect influenced me to follow her examples and teaching.
The main difference between these two types of ways that my Mom has influenced my behavior is in their long-term effects. I cannot tell you how many times I was told to make my bed when I was growing up, but regardless of how many times she told me to do so I rarely make my bed. On the other hand, I grew up watching my Mom interact with family and friends and seeing how much she cared and loved for them, and that has stuck with me, that has shaped who I am and who I strive to be.
This is why Jesus does not say, as Foucault might suggest, ‘you will keep my word, or else’, but rather that those who love him will keep his word. It is through love and not through force or coercion that we are truly shaped and formed by Jesus’ word. Over the past two years that I have been at St. Paul’s with you all, I have heard Fr. Sloane talk about metanoia a number of times. If you don’t remember, metanoia is the Greek word for repentance. As is the case with most translations, our word, repentance, does not capture the fullness of metanoia. Metanoia is not just saying “oops, my bad, I’m sorry” and then continuing on like nothing has happened. Metanoia speaks more to a changing of mind, a reorientation, and as Christian’s that reorientation is a reorientation towards Christ.
Metanoia is not something that can be forced, something that can happen through control and domination, it is something that happens through love. If we are to truly reorient ourselves towards Christ we must do so freely, and we are able to do this because of our love of Christ. To keep Jesus’ word means that we are constantly reorienting ourselves towards Christ. In keeping his word we are not seeking to avoid or gain anything, but out of our love of Christ we are recognizing that he will not lead us astray, we are recognizing that following him is simply the right the to do.
I want to end here by thanking you all for over the past two years helping me to better understand what it means to reorient myself toward Christ. I want to thank you all for welcoming me into this family and sharing with me the love that you have for Christ. I have learned a lot in my time here, but what will stick with me as I enter into ordained ministry in a couple of weeks is the love of Christ you all share, the reorienting and focusing on Christ that continues to happen in this parish day in and day out and how you show that in your lives and ministries. Thank you so much. Amen.